graduated from what's deadly

i had to thank my Father numerously today. as i was recollecting on what He has brought me from..things that seem so small, that i brushed off and was like "whatever, i knew I would get over it". NO. WE got over it.

if you have a great relationship with your parent/parents > be THANKFUL
if you have a father.. > be THANKFUL

i used to be so envious of the friends who were "daddy's girls" and the "my mom is my bestfriend" friends.. it's crazy. i've said once i bow to no one but my Father in Heaven but there was a time when the man that donated time to lay, unholy, with my mother and create me, subconsciously... used to make me cower. i'd cringe at night and ball up in my bed and question every part of existence. but who hasn't lied awake with a million unaswered questions?

Anais Nin is what lead me to grasp the FACT that "IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT". she said, and i quote, "the human father has to be confronted and recognized as human, as man who created a child and then, by his absence, left the child fatherless and then Godless"

it's not a good feeling being Godless
it's. so. lonely.

and to the young ladies that have the greatest relationship with their mothers... YES! auuuhhh, part of me wants to know how it feels. . my mother and i goof around and it's lovely:) but if it's not pertaining to jokes, hehehaha, "you so crazy!" then..we ain't too gucci. it ain't the worst..but it could be (it NEEDS to be) better. our relationship is...crazy (in other words)

i'm no longer envious of those who "don't know what it's like"..you know. how you tell a person "*sucks teeth* *rolls head around and stares* girl, you just don't know how good you got it..."

those seven deadly sins will swallow you up

thank you Father for my diploma to the next level.